My cell phone has passed away

(Sigh) I start with a sigh because it just feels good to let out the bad air and make space for the good. I have had an archaic Nokia phone for a while now. I didn't need bells and whistles; I just needed a phone. Then we had to go hands-free in Cali, and I actually had to go to the store and buy an adapter for the old phone to plug in a headset. The letters are fading from texting- which I mostly do with only one friend, and they are getting a little temperamental. I try to type an "a", and it quits and loads another random screen. SO, today we were at Gilroy Gardens, and Chas said, "I don't like this place anymore." Now, he's tired, it's hot, and I understand feeling that way to an extent, but the boy had just finished ice cream... it's not all that bad! When asked why, he replied, "Because Daddy's not here." Ahhhhh. I get it. So, we called Daddy- at a wedding reception in Philly- to talk. He talked through the parking lot, into the van, and a little down the road before reception is sketchy in the hills. When the call was dropped, Chas placed my phone in the compartment on his side of the van- by his seat. I didn't' think of asking for my phone until we had arrived home. (We had stopped at Petroglyph to get pieces they had painted, and Starbucks to get my "After 2pm iced grande drink for only $2" that I feel I need to take advantage of for some reason.) When I looked in to locate the phone, I remembered that yesterday Anthony announced from the back seat that Chas had poured out the water from his water bottle and "made a pool." So, floating in the pool- already drowned- today was my phone. Water had infiltrated it's screen. It had no life. I grinned.

I had been talking/joking about killing my phone for months now. Not that I need a fancy phone... but I'd LIKE one that just didn't look like a rectangle. No games to entertain the kids when in a situation they find hard to tolerate. I don't know what it is. I just didn't like the phone. So, this was totally unsolicited by me to destroy the phone. It was just that it was the phone's time to die. I told Russ, and he said instantly, "Go get an iphone." Now, that's cool at first thought. Then I think about how many times Starks reaches for the phone and drops it. Or I drop it. It's a lot of responsibility. When I knew my phone was the cheapest before, I felt more lax. It didn't require much thought. So, I'm not sure about the iphone. Russ said again tonight to go to the store tomorrow. I'll have to get the entire lowdown. We'll see... the bummer is not only that the phone is dead but that I lost ALL of my contacts. I'm sure the water made them irretrievable.

Oh, I tell Chas to get a towel and clean up the water. When I went out later to get something from the van, the towel was stuffed in there soaking the water with the bottle empty and upside down in the compartment still. :) I failed to follow up.

BTW, my sister was lovely in giving me feedback after staying a weekend with my boys. She provided insight into Chas- the one I worry the most about. I have put some things into action and tried to recognize opportunities to allow for alone time before he is too tired to self control, and it has been wonderful. And I think he's also recognizing that he needs time and taking it for himself- without instruction. It can be while we're still out and about, but he figures a way to step out of it for a while. What answered prayer that is. Thank you, Lord.

I think that's it... Russ was so cute tonight trying to get these programs installed on this computer from his in Philly so we could chat via video. It's difficult to go to a wedding alone. You are on the outskirts without a partner... and most everyone else did have someone with them. After catching up with family, there's nothing left to really do... Russ wouldn't dance without me there. I don't think guys are apt to go on the dance floor and form a group like women! :) (An aside, at our 6th grade dance before "graduating" to junior high, I was the first person on the dance floor, alone, until others joined me. Then, everyone began to come out and dance. I LOVE to dance.) Anyway, I feel sad for him. I'll cheer him up on Monday! :)

That's it... I didn't mention Anthony. Wow. He's 7 1/2 years old, and he still comes over to snuggle. I love that. I see at times a tiny part of him looking as if maybe he shouldn't be on my lap, but I love that it's tiny still. I want him to always hug and kiss me! He's such a nurturer that I'm hoping he won't push me away. And, I'm still bigger and stronger! I just love when he comes to hold my hand. He's such a wonderful little man. I tickled him tonight on the floor after playing dodgeball (THEY love dodgeball... I have no idea why... I think it's the adrenaline rush they feel while trying to run faster and avoid me hitting them. We use a soft ball, but still.). He was giggling so hard his laughs were whispers! I didn't want to stop. Then Chas wanted some... and Starks. It's such an easy action for a parent that rewards so greatly both you and them. What sounds better than a child laughing? I think if I had to choose in some insane world, I'd choose to lose my sight over my hearing. I'd miss hearing laughter. I'd go crazy without music. It would be very lonely to live in silence. It can get on my nerves to hear such noise while trapped in a van, but I love it all the same. I was blessed by God to have these kids, and I am acutely aware that there are women who will never have to wonder if they go along with the noisy chaos or order it's demise. I hope to choose to keep it more often than stopping it. It'll pass one day, but until then, I'll relish these little people keeping me company all day and making me smile. (I like driving without music just to hear what they are talking about, pretending, or singing on their own.)

I am off to bed. I stayed up until after midnight last night because I could. I think I'll decide to get some quiet time and more sleep tonight!